When I was about 7~8 years old, I had a place to hide myself. The place was in my house. At that time, my parents worked together for a living and my brother was busy for his school work. Naturally, I had the entire house for my own place. But as a child, I needed more cozy and safe place to keep me from all of those ghosts. So I used to make my own house inside of my house. I turned the chair that had four supporting legs upside down. Then I covered the chair legs with my beloved red blanket. It was small, but I was tiny as well. The chair was perfectly fit with my size. And I put extra blankets inside to make the chair more cozy and comfortable. That' it. I used to be so much in love with my own chair house.
I always made my house in front of the TV so that I can watch cartoons or movies inside of my place. Nobody was watching me, so I did whatever I wanted to. I ate lots of snacks, I watched movies like the Titanic, and things like that. I was so happy to have this place and I thought that the place was perfect to hide from scary stuffs.
Once, I remember I had a great day in my own place. It was raining the day. It rained like cats and dogs. I was sitting inside at my place. Rain made everything wonderful. I have loved raining weather ever since I was very young. I could hear the raining sound, which sounded like a lullaby. And wonder if you know the smell of rain. I just love that. The smell of the rain was just like the perfume of mother earth. I could smell the soil, the freshness of nature after it washed. I felt so relaxing inside of my place.
Now I grew up. And cannot fit in my place anymore. But I miss that. I wish I could get the place like that.
1. I liked the way she explained with details how small she was comparing her size with the chair.
ReplyDelete2. The explanations of what she did in the place were really well written, but I think that the essay could be better if there are more explanations and details of the 'place.'
3. Yes. I especially liked when she wrote about the smell and sound of the rain.
4. I would describe that the mood of this place was comforting.
5. I think the writer chose to write about this place because maybe it was one of the places she spent most of her time when she was a child and it can be said that the place was like a friend to her.
6. I think that the writer could improve the paper writing more details to it.
Hi, I'm Lee Yae Lim I enjoyed your writing.
ReplyDelete1. I liked the part that you describe the place specifically by using description.
2. I have the same experience as yours, so i can imagine your place well. There's nothing which is unclear.
3. I liked the part that you described about the rainy day. I can imagine the mood thoruhg details you used like sounds of it, smells of it etc.
4. It seems like very cozy and comfortable place.
5. It seems like very precious place of her. she might have a lot of happy memories in there.
6. I think last paragraph is a bit more awkward from the former 2 paragraphs. it would be better if you make more connection among those.
1. I enjoyed this essay because I have a similar experience.
ReplyDelete2. I hope she describes how it felt in the place with more details.
3. She used smell to describe the atmosphere of a rainy day, and she described the sound of the rain as a lullaby.
4. The overall atmosphere is cozy and comfortable.
5. I think it was a place where she felt most secure and comfortable at that time.
6. I think she could describe more about how the blanket felt.