Life I would never know
Saturday night, sitting in my grandpa's house, warm atmosphere were around. It was my grandpa's 9th birthday. After having dinner, I started to ask questions about his past. Before the serious questions, I asked him about his childhood. I said "Grandpa, can you tell me about your parents?". He didn't say instantly. He said "Well, I'm old now, so I can't really remember. My father's name is JaeCheon Cho, but I cannot figure out my mother's name. My parents had lived very harsh life. They had to face many incidents during their life". I was quite surprised. I knew that he could not remember all the things vividly. But how can he forget his mother's name? I reckon that reflects life. I only lived 20 years but there are many things I forgot. Someday, I may not remember my parent's name. I understood him. So possible.
Anyway, then I asked him about historical memories. I asked him if he remembers Japanese colonial period. He said "I was young. I actually when to army three times. First was in Japanese colonial period. When the Independence happened, I was in Pyongyang". He told me that he was training in pyongyang as a part of Japanese army. Japan was in war with China in Manchuria. Japanese planned to send him to Manchuria. But the indepandance day came suddenly. He said "We were ready for the war actually. They ordered to pack personal things. But the day, we gathered to the center of the facility. Battalion commander said that you can chose whether you would go to Manchuria to fight or to go home". Then he said "Everyone, of course, said to go home". The day, he described, everybody screamed in the street. And they burned every Japanese temple.
He went to Pyongyang station, waiting for the train to go home. But the train, heading to seoul, were full of people. Departing from Manchuria, there were tons of Japanese people, who had to go home as well. So he waited whole day, and finally went to home.
But, shortly after, he went to army again for his duty. He spent another 5 years. During that period, Korean war had broken out.
1. I think the topic of this essay is very interesting. My grandfather has died long time ago, and I do not talk about the war with my grandmother so I haven't heard about it directly from the person who actually has and experience of war. It was very interesting to read.
ReplyDelete2. I can understand what she's trying to deliver.
3. I thinkt the thesis of this essay is the time that the writer haven't experienced
4. "Well, I'm old now, so I can't really remember. My father's name is JaeCheon Cho, but I cannot figure out my mother's name. My parents had lived very harsh life. They had to face many incidents during their life". This quotation made me impressed. It made me curious about how he could not remember his mother's name.
5. I think you should use less quotaions and add more sentences.
6. To improve your essay, I think it would be nice if you fix some of the grammatical mistakes. Also, I think it would be better if you make your sentences more like storytelling, rather than just Q&A. I think you could add more of you and your grandfather's feelings as well.
Writer's Plan For Revising
ReplyDelete1. It was easier than my expecrion. Grandfather kept saying things, as if he planned to tell me the story. If I can have one more chance to do this over again, I will ask him about more specific incidents, rather than just asking periods.
2. Well, the writing went on by chronological order, so it was easy to unferstand.
3. I didn't write much about my reaction toward his words and his emotions. I think I should put these things mixing with the dialogues.